Saturday, November 14, 2009

Worst of the Worst: #64, Corky Romano

I'm going to make this short and sweet. There is no redeeming quality to Corky Romano. Every second of it is agonizing. I question why the villains in Saw or Hostel need to do the crazy things they do when they could just show their victims this movie and be done with it. There came a point about halfway through where I was in physically uncomfortable watching the movie because it was so bad. I wanted very much to shut it off. The fact that I soldiered on means that I can make it through any of these. I deserve a Veterans Day just for finishing this film. The director, the writer, and all of the actors should be embarrassed. It's no surprise that of the main people, the director has never worked again, Chris Kattan's career in comedy is dead, Peter Berg is no longer acting and sticking to directing, Chris Penn is dead, Peter Falk is a shell of himself, and Matthew Glave (the guy who played Glenn Gulia in The Wedding Singer) is only doing TV. A pox on their houses.

Here's a typical scene:

Now that I've watched ten of the worst 100 movies of the decade, according to Rotten Tomatoes, here is my current ranking (#1 being worst, with Rotten Tomatoes' ranking in parentheses):
10. A Sound of Thunder (#93)
9. The New Guy (#94)
8. Pavilion of Women (#86)
7. The Adventures of Pluto Nash (#79)
6. BloodRayne (#48)
5. Rollerball (#28)
4. The Celestine Prophecy (#55)
3. Epic Movie (#21)
2. 3 Strikes (#8)
1. Corky Romano (#64) -- 3 Strikes is way worse of a movie, but it's really low budget. The expectations that would go into a Saturday Night Live-ish movie with some budget mean this is at the top/bottom of the list.

NFL Picks (Last week, 8-5; overall, 74-55-1, including a win on SF -3 on Thursday night):
  • Tennessee (-6.5) vs. Buffalo: Now that Vince Young won me actual cash in the office pool last week, I'm firmly on his bandwagon.
  • New Orleans (-13.5) at St. Louis: I find it hard to pick another team to win the Super Bowl besides New Orleans right now.
  • Tampa Bay (+10) at Miami: When did Miami deserve to be giving double-digit points? I feel like, if Josh Freeman is as good as he seemed last week, we're in an arbitrage position with the Bucs until Vegas catches up with them being better than they've been.
  • Minnesota (-16.5) vs. Detroit: At home, coming off the bye.
  • New York Jets (-7) vs. Jacksonville: See above.
  • Cincinnati (+7) at Pittsburgh: The Steelers look great, but so do the Bengals. Figure this has to be a close game.
  • Denver (-3.5) at Washington: 3.5?! It's not like they're playing Baltimore or Pittsburgh again.
  • Atlanta (-1.5) at Carolina: I smell a trap. I can't pick Carolina, but wouldn't be surprised at all if they won.
  • Kansas City (+1.5) at Oakland: I don't know how Oakland gives points to anyone.
  • Green Bay (+3) vs. Dallas: Dallas has been playing above their heads lately.
  • Arizona (-8.5) vs. Seattle: I'm sure what I'm about to say means that Seattle will win, but this seems like really easy money.
  • San Diego (-2) vs. Philadelphia: That two points means that Vegas thinks the two teams are exactly equal. I don't see that.
  • Indianapolis (-3) vs. New England: I don't care who wins this. I just want to sit back and enjoy.
  • Baltimore (-11) at Cleveland: Brady Quinn's back!

2 comments: said...

I must be lucky. I only saw one of the ten worst movies in your list (Rollerball). I agree it is a bad movie, though I enjoyed it at the time. But maybe you are referring to a different movie. The Rollerball I saw was made about 30 years ago and starred James Cann. Maybe the one on your list is a remake.

Josh said...

It was the remake (the list is only movies from this decade). I haven't seen the Caan one, but I've heard it was a lot better.