Trying To Get A Nut To Move Your Butt

• The Monologue:
• Lindsay Lohan is out of jail after thirteen days. She had a hard time fitting in there at first because Rachel McAdams kept mocking her friends.
• I know that wasn't funny, but nothing funny is going on, okay? Gosh!
• Okay, with Mean Girls and Napoleon Dynamite, I'm a Crash joke away from the 2004 trifecta.
• Random Pop Culture:
• I knock it mercilessly, but I have to give credit where credit is due. This past week's episode of Entourage was one of the funniest in the show's run. Everything clicked. I almost spit out my soda when Ari kicked the mail cart for no apparent reason. And the last scene between Eric and Sloan was just ridiculous.
• Random Tweet That I Censored Myself Before Sending: At thirty-four, I'm like two seventeen-year-olds. I'm Roman Polanski's fantasy.
• Random Video:
  • There are a lot of great birthdays on August 2, including Kevin Smith, Peter O'Toole, and TV's hottest mom, Mary Louise Parker. Not much in the way of music though. Today does mark the 40th birthday of one Zelma Davis. She's the woman seen, but not heard because she was famously lip-syncing, in this video.