No Such Thing As A Guilty Pleasure

• The Monologue:
• Ellen is leaving Idol. So are we all.
• They claim this is the world's biggest tent. I claim it's a female condom for Snooki.
• Ravens rookie Sergio Kindle injured himself falling down stairs in the middle of the night. Now, they're saying it might be narcolepsy. Right... Narcolepsy... I had a narcolepsy and Coke just last night.
• Random Pop Culture:
• Yes, I watched the season premiere of Jersey Shore. I didn't watch any of the first season, but I was curious and the clips I had seen looked fun to mock. Well, color me hooked. It's maybe more stupid than I had feared, but it is a lot funnier than I had hoped. They are dumb. They say lots of funny, dumb things. A few highlights from the season premiere were Snooki getting a spray tan because Obama is taxing tanning salons because, she claims, he is already dark-skinned; Snooki falling in love with fried pickles; lots of funny dancing; and The Situation saying my favorite line, "I'm bringing Jersey to the MIA, which is Miami."
• By the way, probably the first time I've turned on MTV in at least five years.
• Why do all lists suck? Someone comes out with their list of the top ten foreign films of the last decade, but includes a rule that they can only have one film per language. So even though Y Tu Mama Tambien and Pan's Labyrinth are easily two of the top films, only Pan's Labyrinth made their list. City of God was number one and it is fantastic.
• Another list dealt with the biggest gay badasses on TV. Omar wasn't number one. Let me make this clear: Omar is the number one badass, gay or not.
• Random Video:
• 44 years ago today, Cream made its onstage debut, at a club in Manchester.